Just a Little Bit Closer to Chaos

Lots going on for the month of June. Some good, some bad. Some AWESOME.

  • First family trip to Disney World! LJ will not only get to meet my mom for the first time, he’ll get to meet Mickey! I’m hoping we go to Sea World, too.
  • LJ’s first birthday.
  • Louie’s mom’s 50th birthday.
  • My 23rd birthday (which will be spent in Florida).
  • Rockfest next weekend (need babysitter for this all day event…)
  • New therapist (replacing Debbie)

We’re leaving the day of Louie’s mom’s birthday. And we’ll be gone for his brother’s 21st birthday as well. I did not plan this trip, either, and the tickets can’t be changed.

And as much as the trip is suppose to be for my birthday, I have this overwhelming feeling thinking about it. Having a baby means everything takes longer… traveling with a baby… well, you know how some people see a baby before the board a flight and cringe a little (even if they like babies…) Well, think of that same cringe for about a month prior. That’s what mommy is feeling.

I need this concert coming up. 50,000 people will be there and I need it. I didn’t get to go last year because I was so pregnant. This year, we bought tickets well before but Louie failed to give him mom any notice and now we have to figure out a babysitter for an all-day event for a child that requires a lot of extra patience. Not to mention said person will probably need to spend a few hours with me so they know all the tips and tricks of LJ.

Lately, I’ve felt completely overwhelmed. I’m either working, making an appointment (or waiting to make one), in an appointment, cleaning, feeding LJ or putting him to sleep, changing his diaper, remembering to give him a bath, remembering to pay bills, doing laundry at least once a week, remembering if I bathed (ew, I know), remember if I ate, and making dinner. Oh, and I can’t forget about Bogey.

I don’t think it’s going to get better anytime soon, either. Actually, it will probably get worse. I want to start taking one class this fall so I can get started on my certificate for web design. I know it will be a lot more work on top of what I have but I need to do something. I sometimes feel like an idiot because I never stayed in school to get a degree or anything. While I know some of this is due to a lot of circumstances, it doesn’t make me feel any better.

So wait. Doesn’t that make for another appointment of my list? Crap.

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