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    Wife to Bryce and mother of three children, LJ, Noah, and Sofia. Living in a very "special" world of special needs. LJ has cerebral palsy, myoclonic seizures, developmental delays, and cortical visual impairment. This is our yellow brick road.
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Can Eye Deal?

We had our first in-home visit from Kim, our vision therapist. I absolutely love her. I know we’ll make good progress with her and her visits every other week. She talked about things going on with him such as his left eye crossing when an object gets too close and sensitivity to light and various things we can do to help work with him to not overwhelm him. He has a problem processing… which I honestly am not sure what that means. That’s my fault, really. I’m so exhausted, I hardly recall the appointment.

LJ and I have a had a long day. He just didn’t want to nap, and every mom knows how important naps are. I could use one right now.

I did jump on the ball, though…(who came up with that saying?) I called our pediatrician’s office and talked to a nurse about getting a referral from our doctor to see the neurologist. The involuntary dropping of his head is a small hindrance to some of the vision therapy. Well, not really, it would just be easier. We also want to make sure there’s nothing else we need to worry about, if all this wasn’t enough.

My stress level peaked when I opened a couple bills from the hospital. I want to scream. Mostly at my insurance company. Why are they so slow? I don’t know how many times the hospitals are going to re bill them. And aren’t they suppose to send me a letter of procedures they aren’t covering? The only statements I’ve received are the ones they are. I’ve called them so many times and they’ve just given me the run-around. Just tell me that you aren’t covering the claim so I can appeal it.

Sometimes I think about when we’ll have our second child and it scares me. I wonder if we’ll go through this again or if we’ll have a “normal” birth where we can rest for 2 days, with the baby. Then I feel guilty, because I don’t want my son to feel like he was trouble for me and if it does happen, I wouldn’t want him or her to feel that way either. I just don’t know if I have the strength to do that.

The pediatricians office just called back. They want me to take him the developmental pediatrician first, which is ridiculous because we were suppose to have an appointment with them already (when we were discharged, the nurses set it up) but the appointment had disappeared. Plus it will take months to get into a neurologist since they are short staffed. That’s exactly why I wanted to schedule the appointment now.

Some days I want to forget I quit smoking.


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